Say What?!

Just thought I'd share a recent conversation I had with my mom. I found it to be rather amusing.

Me: I cannot believe how big Stella's thighs are.

Mi Madre: Gee, I wonder where she gets those from.

Awkward pause.

Mi Madre: Hello?

Me: Gee, thanks.

Mi Madre: What?

Me: I said THIGHS, Mom.

Mi Madre: Oh, I thought you said EYES.

Sure she did.

Four Months Already?!

I was a bit hesitant to write a post all about Stella's growth, progress, etc., but this blog is more for my family than anyone else, so I'm going to do it anyway. There's no way I'd be motivated to track it otherwise.

Everyone was right when they talked about how fast the time goes. It truly is unbelievable. It's crazy to think Stella is already four months old. Sometimes I feel like she's been with us forever, but most of the time, I am still in disbelief that I'm actually a mom. What a privilege!

Stella is a BIG girl. I don't think I realize it as much until I see her around other babies that were born around the same time. Of course I think it's wonderful that she's growing stronger so I'm not concerned, but it's slightly amusing, too.

Stella had her big four-month appointment this week, and here are a few of the results:

Height: 2 ft. 1.59 in.

Weight: 17 lbs. 15.4 oz.

Head: 17.13 in.

She's in the 90s for everything and gets an A+ for growth according to our pediatrician. I'm so thankful!

Stella is babbling constantly and has really started squealing and squeaking. We were also pretty excited when she rolled from her tummy to her back. I was wondering when that would finally happen! I've only seen it happen once when she was in her crib the other night, but it was pretty exciting for this mama. She's starting to get feisty and hates that she can't pull the hanging toys off her activity mat or tear some of the toys off her little activity table. And, everything is going right in to her mouth! Recently, she loves playing with blankets and burp cloths and attacks every book I read to her.

At about four months she hit a sleep regression. Where were you guys on this one? I mentioned it to one of my friends, and she told me that one of her friends had told her all about the four-month sleep regression. I had no clue! It. Was. Brutal. Not sure if it's safe to mention it in the past tense yet, but I'm stepping out in faith. For about a week and a half she was crazy. One night I swear she was up 10-12 times. From there, it finally started to taper and would drop to 4-6 times per night, and then there was last night. Oh glory! She slept SEVEN STRAIGHT HOURS. It was heavenly. And, I failed to mention during the sleep regression that naps were basically non-existent. Today she napped for almost two hours this morning and is currently working on a second nap. Folks, our baby just might be back! One can hope anyway.

Enjoy a few four-month pictures. She's posing on a quilt my great-grandma made in the first one. Isn't it beautiful?! It's also worth noting she's sporting a 12 month onesie in this shot. The cloth diapers make her a bit more bootylicious, but still!

Our little sweetheart is doing so well, and as I read about other families struggling with sick children, trying to conceive without success and losing children far too young, I never for a second forget to cherish this time.

60+ Degrees in January?! Yes, please.

Travis and I often reflect on how different our lives are post-Stella. Last night we were thrilled spending Friday evening on a Target run and catching up on a couple of TV shows via Hulu. Though we weren't exactly party animals before, we very rarely spent a Friday evening at home in our "past lives." The funny thing is, I don't miss the old days much at all.

Speaking of party animals, though, I apparently birthed one. This girl has gone crazy and has decided sleeping is boring. She wants to be where the action is. Only thing is, there really is no action in our house at 2:30 in the morning. Well, I guess there is now.

Anyway, today we were granted an unseasonably warm, beautiful and sunny day. The temperature was over 60 degrees, and we couldn't wait to bust out the stroller and hit up a little family walk. We snapped several photos on this afternoon's outing, and I must say, I think some of them turned out pretty cute. Stella's expressions crack me up, but she wasn't too thrilled about our photo shoot or the sun in her eyes.

Thankful for every day!

We followed up our time at the park with a spiked hot chocolate from VanBuskirk Chocolate Bar. It was our second time there, and I really love the place. We definitely recommend it if you're in the area.

Stella's Birth Story: Part 2

Though we had a few minor scares throughout my pregnancy, I was so fortunate to have a pregnancy that progressed quickly and fairly easily.  It’s a little weird to share some of these details with such a broad group of people, but when I was pregnant, I really enjoyed reading others’ birth stories so I feel like I should return the favor by writing mine. It’s more for myself than anyone, but maybe you’ll enjoy it, too. And, if you don’t like birth stories or babies, you’ll pretty much hate this blog going forward. 

At 36 weeks, I was already 2-3 centimeters dilated, 4 centimeters at 38 and 5+ centimeters at 39. While it was interesting and somewhat relieving to know how quickly I was progressing with little to no pain or effort on my part, it made for a grueling last month of my pregnancy. The “any-day-now” mentality really got to me. I was so anxious and experienced a lot of pre-term labor pains leading me to believe I was in labor about four different times.

The real show began on the evening of September 21 (39 weeks).  I began having pretty regular contractions. We were hesitant to believe them because I had experienced several bouts of false labor previously. But, at around 8:30 p.m. when they were around 4 minutes apart, we decided to get some ice cream and prepare to wait it out to see if things would slow down or keep up. I could only eat a little bit of the ice cream and quickly lost my appetite for it. We continued timing the contractions, and when they were coming steadily at around 3.5 to 4 minutes apart, we knew it was time. I was getting to the point where I couldn't talk through them and definitely could not continue walking during them.

Travis decided to go ahead and call our doula to share an update with her. Unfortunately, she had fallen extremely ill and informed us she wouldn’t be able to make it to the hospital. At first, I thought it was no big deal, and I knew we could handle it on our own. Then, I started getting really nervous as my plans were falling apart. She was prepared with a backup, but the thought of someone I didn’t know well attending the birth was not one I liked. Fortunately, one of my dearest friends is an aspiring doula and had offered to be our doula from the very beginning. I turned down her offer because I wasn’t ready to bear it all to someone I see on a regular basis. In the moment, though, I changed my mind. I wanted her, and her calming presence, there. Fortunately, despite last minute’s notice, she jumped at the opportunity and agreed to act as our doula. I now can’t imagine it any other way.

Prior to the birth, a photographer approached us via our original doula offering to photograph our birth (you know, the first moments when you lay eyes on your child, etc.) free of charge. Though we hadn’t really considered it before, we warmed up to the idea and thought it would be a great opportunity and would also leave Travis, our doula and nurses free to focus on keeping me happy rather than trying to figure out our camera. Despite our efforts to plan, our photographer had to go out of town unexpectedly to attend a funeral. That meant no photos for us. So, as I contemplated our trip to the hospital with my original plans falling apart, I started falling apart myself. In hindsight, it wasn’t a huge deal, but I am a planner by nature so when things began unraveling, I was frustrated.

I have really amazing friends. A dear friend of mine loves taking photos, does a great job and had already offered to attend our birth and photograph it for us. Again, I wasn’t ready to expose myself to people I see nearly on a weekly basis, and I was pretty terrified I’d turn into a complete beast, so I declined her offer. Having already had my heart set on photos with my new family, I decided to see if she might be willing to attend our birth with basically no notice at all. And, she was! In fact, she arrived at the hospital the exact same time we did. I’m telling you, I am extremely blessed with fantastic friends.

We arrived at the hospital around 1 a.m., and I already knew there was no way they would be sending me home. At the initial check I was already dilated to a 7. We assumed that meant we'd be having a baby shortly thereafter. After several hours of pretty intense labor, my water still had not broken, and I appeared to be somewhat stuck at 8.5 cm. We considered having my water broken and went back and forth on that decision for a little while. We wanted to avoid any interventions, but we eventually decided to allow my water to be broken. After that, the contractions became even more intense and more "productive."

To be honest, the labor was far more difficult than I had ever imagined. Obviously I knew it wouldn’t be a cakewalk, but wow, it was terrible. During our Bradley classes, our instructor (who had given birth with no pain medication to six children) described contractions as “waves of energy.” Pardon my language, but that was complete bullshit. It hurt. Very badly. Yikes. It. Was. Awful. I didn’t know bodies could even feel that much pain. Either that, or I am a weenie.

Travis was definitely my key support throughout the entire labor. He was right by my side for almost every single contraction. It’s safe to say he probably only missed 4 to 5 “waves of energy” throughout the entire process. And that was because he had to use the restroom or grab a drink of water or something like that. He was unbelievable, and I don’t think I could have done it without his support and prayers.

My sweet friends were also pivotal. They helped by applying counter pressure, encouraging me and praying for me. When I say I can’t imagine the event without them, I really mean that. It meant so much to have them there with us.

Back to the story…I really thought I had hit the transition phase of my labor multiple times, but when it really hit, I knew it. It was not pretty. I’ll spare you all the details, but whoa, it was U-G-L-Y. After that portion was over, I pushed for about one hour, and then baby arrived! Travis announced the gender to me and I was stunned. I was sure we were having a boy, but I was instead handed the most beautiful, chubby, dark-headed baby girl in the world. It was such a surreal and incredible experience that I will never, ever forget.

Stella Breann joined our family at 9:07 a.m. weighing 9 pounds 8 ounces and measuring 21 inches long.  She hasn’t stopped showing off since.

And, if you’re wondering if I turned into a beast during labor, I’d have to say no. Foul-mouthed animal is more like it.  My phrases went from, “Oh boy, that really hurts,” to colorful expressions I intend to never repeat.  I will forever be haunted by Luke 6:45 “…because the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.” That doesn’t apply to childbirth, right?

Checking in.

It was tough, I tell ya.

                                        

Love at first sight.

First photo as a new family.

Here we go!

The greatest day of my life. I will treasure these photos forever.

Stella's Birth Story: Part 1

Well hello there, my long lost friends. After a LONG hiatus, I’m back! I’ve decided to start blogging again, and although my first few posts won’t really be timely, I really want to share the story of my very first daughter’s birth.

I was hesitant to share it because I know birth is a hot-button topic responsible for igniting mommy wars everywhere, but I decided I don’t really care. I have always been of the mindset that you have to be confident in your own decisions. Otherwise, why would you make them? Doesn’t mean those choices are always perfect or correct, but I believe you make the best decision based on the information you have. So, if this post makes folks uncomfortable or if you disagree with my thoughts and choices, I don’t really care. Sorry, but I just don’t. Eek, what an abrasive jump back into blogging, right?! I’m really not that bitter. I just don’t feel like having to tiptoe around the next few posts so I want to emphasize that my choices may be different than yours, you may think I’m nuts or dumb (if so, you’re kinda right!), but I want to share my story. It doesn’t mean I’m judging you by sharing or I think the choices you made (and many of you had no choice at all in your birth story, and for that, I’m sorry!) were wrong. It just means we are different.

Okay, now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I’ll start from the beginning and will break this birth story up into a few different parts. Blog series are both fun and so annoying so I apologize in advance. Here goes…

Travis and I were thrilled to find out in January of 2012 that we were expecting a baby! We were filled with a variety of mixed emotions, many of which stemmed from previous and traumatic trials we had faced previously. I’ll spare you those details, but if you want to discuss our entire journey sometime, let me know.

Although very nerve racking at times, my pregnancy was mostly pretty easy, and for that, I am so thankful. Of course I had the usual fatigue, some headaches, achy back, yada, yada, yada, but more than anything else, I was absolutely thrilled at the privilege of being pregnant. Never once did I forget what a special miracle I was experiencing or forget that it’s one not everyone has the joy of experiencing.

To be honest, I was pretty nervous from when we found out the news I was pregnant until about week 34. Some beyond that, but after week 34, I felt much more confident in a healthy delivery. That’s a long time to be nervous, but I just couldn’t help it. Believe me, I tried. Once I hit about the midway point and began to finally accept that we most likely would be introducing a sweet new baby, we began planning.

I knew I wanted a natural, unmedicated birth from the beginning. Of course I knew I may not be able to because so much of childbirth is unpredictable, but it was my desire. Fortunately, Travis is awesome and was thrilled to do anything he could to make doing so possible. I began researching and reading a variety of books, and the best part was that Travis did, too. We spent hours and hours discussing our findings and eventually signed up for Bradley classes, which center on the concept of the husband (or birth partner) as coach. We enrolled in the course, and I began my journey to becoming a hippy. Just kidding. The classes at least fulfilled a little bit of my longing anyway.

We approached our challenge of having a natural birth somewhat like one would prepare to participate in an athletic event, like a marathon. We knew I couldn’t just say I wanted a natural, unmedicated birth and then accomplish it. We knew it would take work. We studied, I watched my diet, I performed a variety of exercises in preparation, I sought chiropractic care, and we hired a doula.  Much like preparing to run a marathon, we had to train. We did all this knowing that there was a chance I would not be able to accomplish the task. Just as someone training for a marathon could experience a devastating knee injury or fall sick the day of the race, I knew there was a possibility that I would have absolutely no control over what would happen. We decided that regardless of what happened, we, and our baby, would benefit from more knowledge and a pursuit of a healthy pregnancy.

Travis was a pivotal part of the entire process. Sounds funny because that’s pretty obvious, but he really took it to the next level. He attended every Bradley class with me, adopted the same diet and even made me a hot, protein-packed breakfast almost every single morning. What a man.

So, as you can see, we didn’t take our decision to pursue a natural, unmedicated childbirth lightly. I was pretty determined while also remaining cautiously optimistic.

Below are a few pictures from throughout my pregnancy.

 20 weeks

 24 weeks in Puerto Rico

 31 weeks

 34 weeks

39 weeks (hours before baby arrives!)